News from the Front Lines

IMD Ignites War of Words

Bacchic Aubade reporting for   Front Lines News

Yesterday, a lone soliloquy suffered post lexicon disorder (PLD) after going over an Improvised Mime Device (IMD) with a run on sentence. The soliloquy had just made a dramatic entry after internal conflict had triggered a major scene.

When the IMD went off I was sure we would all be carried off in cacophonies,” said one witness before breaking down into monosyllables..

As the IMD went off, fragments of Improvisational Gestures and Exaggerated Facial Expressions were embedded between the lines. Character Revelation and Emotional Intensity was reduced to fits and starts, followed by lengthy pauses.

Symptoms of escalating alliteration were immediate and consequently resulted in jarring jargon, severe solipsism, and spells of sound and fury signifying nothing. The soliloquy needed to be immediately placed into isolation before the more serious symptoms slipped into the rest of the text.

The Head Honchos and Nameless Experts from Central Synecdoche say it will take up to a year of intensive linguistic analysis and active parsing to recover lost levels of meaning and subtle shades of symbolism.

After surveying the damage one official said, “All that may be left is a couple of significant asides.

The situation worsened when Circus trunks loaded with Comic Relief slipped on a second IMD. A bystander, who had just recovered from a pratfall, observed, “ It was an absurd mess. Broken shticks were slapping in the wind and the groaners were all over the road. I tell you, we were all in summer stock. We just stood there in medias res. You could hear a pun drop.

 

The IMD triggered a verbal melt-down that left plot holes across the entire narrative arc. Several minor character roles rapidly expanded, only to collapse into ambiguity. A paradox was seen quickly approaching the Climactic Moment. The Moment immediately stalled in a state of Uncertainty and was unable to recover any momentum.

Witnesses report that Motivation lost total sense of direction after encountering clouds of ennui. It meandered into the State of Apathy. All efforts to redirect Motivation proved fruitless.

A protracted war of words soon broke out as gathering Dark Metaphors loomed over the plot line. Cause and Effect were lost midst the confusion of punctuated attacks.

Editorial Support said things became desperate as Descriptive Details succumbed to Vague References. When asked for possible outcomes, General Hyperbole responded with great agitation, “Attempts to gather a clear understanding of textual integrity have begun to fail. We could end up in a Book Remainder Bin, or worse be reduced to the Slush Pile.”

Narrative Coherence was oblivious to Efforts at Central Clarity. Spurious Rumors staying at Inn Uendo only offered baseless comments. The lines of communication were completely broken. The only thing that got through was the sound of one hand clapping.

Soon after that, the Tankas rolled in. Line movement was quickly cited. A complement of seven line stanzas marched out of the marginal spaces. The lines, containing five and seven syllables, imposed structure and emotional impact. The zone of conflict had been indented with tropes.

Haiku parachuted in with Haiga support. Haiga support, worth a thousand words, extended the Haiku’s metaphorical range into the non-verbal.

Parachutes floating –

The sky full of white blossoms,

The front all quiet.

A Brief Explanation or an Apology (Depending on your sense of humour): The above piece of writing grew out out of my addiction for puns & word-play and reading  Jasper Fforde’s latest Thursday Next novels, One of Our Thursdays is Missing.  The setting for most of the novel is Fictionland where the fictional version of Thursday Next must find the real Thursday.  The Thursday Next series is a romp through an alternate reality, where time travel and access to the reality of the book-world/Fictionland makes for adventure and satire. The whole series is highly recommended. For a unique police proceedural series check out Fforde’s  Nursery Crime Division.

How I did that: The images were created with the assistance of wordle, an online site that lets you generate word clouds. I then used the word clouds to create the images using  Paint Shop Pro-X and virtualPhotographer plug-in.

25 thoughts on “News from the Front Lines

  1. Pingback: Shakespeare’s Sonnets III & XXIX | Dark Pines

    1. elmediat

      Somehow I missed replying earlier, my apologies. Hopefully your head has stopped hurting by now. Thanks again for all of your comments . 🙂

  2. gweaverii

    Lord, how I wish I’d had this extended metaphor when I was teaching high school English lit to a bunch of plowboys in the mountains of NC years and years ago. I had only one boy during my tenure who would have been stumped, then embarrassed, then off in search of old Merriam’s “Concise Oxford Dictionary of Literary Terms”. He would have remembered this for the rest of his life. I think you just wrote my entire lesson plan for at least one year here…forty-five years late.

    Honestly, this little piece is, without a doubt, the best extended metaphor I ever read. And the use of irony is astonishing. I just shook my old head in wonder. I read it again and again. I don’t save what that I read here, but I will save this one. I thank you mightily for pointing me to it. 🙂

    1. elmediat

      So glad you enjoyed it. I don’t know if too many people got this one. You have to have be English teachers like us, or have a joy of language and literature. As to the irony, it comes in part from being Canadian. Any country that can elect both Harper and Chretien as Prime ministers must have a strong sense of irony.

      The inspiration for this piece came from those wonderful Thursday next novels. Anyone with a love of zany mysteries and literature will enjoy that series.

    1. elmediat

      Thanks Sync. If you are interested the inspiration for this piece check the links provided at the end of the blog. I also used this exercise to generate a sample media literacy assignment that is on my other blog (see link).

  3. George Weaver

    Reblogged this on She Kept A Parrot and commented:
    I do not re-blog. I repeat. I do not re-blog. I am reblogging elmediat’s “News from the Front Lines” to insure that I have my own personal copy for future reference and simple delight. Enjoy the best extended metaphor you ever read. Thank you, Elmediat.

    1. elmediat

      Thanks very much. Check out the Thursday Next novels and the Nursery Crime Division if you have a chance. They are great entertainment and inspiration. 🙂

    1. elmediat

      Thanks for dropping by. 😉 I suffer from a bit of a word-play addiction. There are times when it is difficult to stop or I’ll have fits & phrases. It actually took awhile to compose the piece and figure out suitable images to accompany it. I started out intending on writing a descriptive paragraph inspired by some scenes in the Thursday Next novel. As it took shape , I was influenced by the news reports about Canadian troops in Afghanistan. I suppose it was my way of processing the depressing news which was filled with dark irony.

  4. That took me forever to read, as I had to keep breaking off to catch the giggle-fits that were running around the room before the cat ate them and became completely unfit to live with. He loves the way they make his tail curl like Tiggers bum.

    I shall have to find that series…thanks a lot. 😛 Like I needed another series to drag me away from my “work” and into it’s deep and hilarious world!

    Thank you for writing that…I’ll be sure to get you back for it soon!

    (PS: Have you ever heard a song called “Wet Dreams”? It was on Dr. Demento, but I forget who wrote it. *hangs head* It’s a song done completely in ocean/fish related puns. “The mechanic said I had blown a seal. I told him leave my personal life out of it, and fix the car!” )

  5. elmediat

    Thanks for visiting and commenting. I will be checking out your poetry blog. Not familiar with the song.. Considering the title and content no wonder the name of the composer slipped away from you. 🙂

  6. When I was in college these kinds of puns and absurdities were purported to be the work of “the man with the green button” and from him rules were carved onto tablets sand…I could go on forever with this wondrous play you have given us. Brava!

    1. elmediat

      Thanks very much for your comments. I will have to try to get a portrait of “the man with the green button”. 😀

  7. Pingback: Stage in Search of Characters | Implied Spaces

    1. elmediat

      Glad you enjoyed. Before I started Implied Spaces, my experiments in creative writing were posted on Dark Pines Photo. You’ll find a page link to phantasmagoria tales at the top of the blog. 🙂

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